This is my third attempt to be honest with this virtual page. Honesty, alike truth gives the body and mind a jolt in a way that little else can.
Maybe it's because I've been debating how open I want to be on a blog and whether in all that's good in heaven, I should be blabbing my insecurities. Yes, it's therapeutic and cleansing in a way, but it also has a tendency to leave you feeling that bit more bare than before.
And what is this honesty or truth that has left me wrestling when I should be working, you may be wondering? It is the fear that secretly crept up on me that I am perhaps too awkward and odd to get that sweet gift that comes in a mutual love with another.
Not sure whether this is just normal insecurity we all feel at times or a horribly deeper symptom of something horrible and deeper.
Perhaps it is merely the age old question we humans have carried in our souls since forever ago; 'am I enough? Am I good enough?'
Funny how, even though I've heard the answer to this a million times I still find myself asking it.
I think "Am I good enough?" is a question that every single person asks at some point. You start to wonder if there is something wrong with you that's keeping the opposite sex away. I probably rip myself to shreds at least a few times a week trying to figure it out.
ReplyDeleteYou are truly a beautiful person inside and out. And I'm not one of those people that says that to everyone in hopes that it makes them feel better. I actually believe that statement. I guess guys are just slow sometimes to picking up on the fact that they have a great girl in front of them.
Amanda, my love, thank you. Thank you for your kind words. I felt silly writing that, thinking, 'who wants to know this anyway?' But hey ho, I wrote it anyway.
ReplyDeleteWish you were in Nashville we could go and start watching films in the park (they start in June).
You my dear are a gem, a rare and truly brilliant gem. Tell that to the question when it it starts to resurface again.